So the title of this blog might be misleading, sex is a big deal in the respect that it is critical to the continuation of the species and is arguably the greatest single motivator in every adult's life, food and shelter might trump it though but you can tend to get enough of those and that is typically not the case with sex for most. So sex is both important to us as a species and for our own personal well being, so in that light it seems like the biggest deal imaginable, but that is the problem. The mind set I just explained is what causes so many humans to be having no where near as much sex as they would like to be, we are putting it on a pedestal and making it seem too good for so many of us, as if it is only for those attractive and powerful people that deserve it.
This is bullshit and everyone is not only deserving of sex but should do whatever they can to promote their own healthy and regular sex life and the myth that sex is this magical, mythical and unspeakable thing is the barrier that holds so many back.
You can have sex without too much trouble no matter how you look, and I am not talking about paying for it. If you come into the situation with the right positive attitude you can, for want of a better term, 'convert' many interactions with people you find sexually attractive into sexual interactions.
Think of it this way. You are at a party or a bar and you see someone that you would like to sleep with, or at least it seems that way at first glance. You have a few options:
1. No nothing, they are probably not interested anyway.
2. Approach them and be friendly, you'll find out if they are interested and at least you'll meet them.
3. Approach them and be flirty, you want sex so let them know and see if they respond in kind or not.
So let's go through our possible outcomes from these options:
1. Nothing comes from nothing, this is never the right answer, the fear will lead you here but remind yourself that you have nothing to lose, you'll probably not meet again if rejected and even if you do the world will not end.
2. This is better, you will get a chance of having sex if they are attracted to you and confident at showing this to you but you are also not actually going for what you want. This can and will lead to misunderstandings and is not useful to either of you.
3. You are most likely to be rejected if they do not like the look of you but if they do like you you will have the greatest chance of sex. So put it this way, if you flirt successfully if there was every any chance of the target of your affections sleeping with you you will have sex because you are showing sexual and confident about it which is a turn on. If you are rejected when flirting then you can say to yourself you did the best you could and it was not going to happen because you have done everything you can to improve the chances. There is no doubt left in your mind about it.
So as you can see having the strength of will to push directly for what you want is always the best way. You do this because you realise that sex is not a taboo and it is not a rare crazy thing to want. No it is an everyday thing that you should by all means be having.
You will be rejected but that is normal and try to see it as practice, although that is way easier said than done...
If there is one thing you must remember it's that if you keep going you will get yourself a satisfying sex life, it just takes some time and luck honestly.
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